Aftermath:2006

The Xmas weekend swished by.
I woke up, extremely reluctant to get out of my warm bed in such a cold, rainy day.
In the end, I snoozed for another hour before dragging myself out of bed.
I managed to get to the office only by noon, self-proclaiming it to be a boxing half day off.
Anyhow, Work , today, was rather efficient.

All my good pals came over to my place for turkey dinner last night.
The salad , that I tossed, was everyone's hot pick.
I made a mental note to do it again next year.
I think i should post my seafood salad online one of these days.
Again, I drank too much last night. Fortunately, I wasnt gibbering.

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This marks my second Xmas in Singapore. The first was in 2004. I went drinking ice cold beer at icb with Babe and Casey. I dreaded it for it was so messy and humid in Orchard with everyone spraying tins of white. I find it audacious for pedestrains to attack strangers and cars waiting for the green light. Then, I find it incredibly suffocating to live here. All my old friends were gone and I didnt want to mingle here.

Between then and now, so much have changed. Now, I have friends on my speed dial. My weekends are always packed with lunches and dinners. So busy was I that reading at home was never on my weekend agenda. I have thousand and one things I want to do, and a million more reasons to get out of home. Even though I still call my Hongkong friends every other day, I know I can rely on my friends here as well.

Its a very warm feeling.

I wish I can predict the future and plan everything on hindsight. The closing of a year never fails to daunt me. It is a gnawing feeling to know that time flashes by , like a trace of light. Naturally, there are many I have accomplished and much more undone.

As Shaun reveals, new year resolution are best kept close to heart. Henceforth, I will follow suit and work towards a happier year ahead.

"There is just one life for each of us: our own." , Euripides

Your Birthdate: March 31

You don't love lightly. For you, love is always a serious undertaking. However, you are able to love many types of people. You can bring out the best in almost anyone. Love surprises you often. You never know when or where you'll find it next. Number of True Loves You'll Have: 2 Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 1 You are most compatible with people born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd, and 31st of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

" It was about sharks. I learned that they have to keep moving in order to live. It's the only way they can breathe. Forward motion, constantly forcing water through their gills.....The more I was away, the worse it got.I'd come back and couldnt speak the language. Out there the pain was palpable; you breathe in air. Back here, no one talked about life and death. No one seemed to understand. I'd go to movies, see friends, but after a couple days I'd catch myself reading flight schedules, looking for something, somplace to go; a bomb in Afghanistan, a flood in Haiti. I'd become a predator, endlessly gliding in saltwater seas, searching for the scent of blood.

I recently saw a documentary about sharks on the Discovery Channel. Scientists had found a species of shark, a deep-water one, that didnt have to keep moving to stay alive. It can breathe lying still. It can rest. I find that hard to believe. " - Dispatches from the edge, Anderson Cooper

I was supposed to go to the gym , yoga and getting booze for christmas. I ended up watching Curse of the Golden Flower with EH after gym. Its his day off as well.

I must say the movie is superb. The pairing of Chow Yun Fatt with Gong Li is formidable. Their presence overshadows everybody and anything else. Even the regal set pales in comparison when Chow Yun Fatt and Gong Li came out in gold splendor on the Chrysanthemum festival. Surprisingly, the much hyped up scenes showing bosoms of Gong Li and the chambermaids were not evident in the movie ,as what has been circulating in the media. As the plot thickens, Zhang Yimou captures my attention , as well as EH, with its suspence.

There is a tiny observation after watching this show as compared to The Banquet, starring Ziyi Zhang, in September.

I left the theatre today , mesmerized totally by the formidable acting chops of the two lead cast. Whereas in The Banquet, I was swayed by the setting and cinematography of the movie.

Today is a day OFF!
I just woke up.
I'd better rush to town before the entire stretch is jammed packed.
I wanna hit the gym and do my final Xmas shopping.
The sun is bright and glory finally.
I am feeling perky and joyous .

This week has been pretty busy. I was busy getting lost as the year comes to a close. There are resolves that I want to push forward but simply cannot see it moving as vice versa.

As much as himbolicious vehemently denies, he is feeling low as he has been incompetent in meeting his resolutions for 2006. Naturally, himbolicious finds instant gratification in retail therapy and spoilt himself silly with an enormous amount of mopping in materialism. So much for "Live and let live."

I am sure I will do better next year. For believing is almost the entire battle survived. And execution will be another year's resolution.

Anyway, on a more serious note. I read it on TIME this week.

The RICHEST 1% of the world population owns 40% of the world's wealth
The POOREST 40% of the world population owns LESS THAN 1% of the world's wealth

I am within that middle 59%. I wish I belong to the richest 1% of world population and I swear I will get Hedi Silmane to design my rubbish bin in alligator leather. I will give all my loved ones an entire Bottega collection for Xmas. Distribute christmas turkey to the poorest 40% before en-routing to UK joining Jon for Xmas and then doing New year pret-a-porter shopping in Milan.

I am swirling in my own fantasies again. Must be the tap water that I drank just now.

I am gibbering whatever ,only, I can comprehend again.

Does anyone has good recommendations for hotel/guesthouse in Siem Reap?
I am planning for my trip but have absolutely no idea which to choose?

You have got a friend - Carole King

When you're down and troubled
And you need some loving care
And nothing, nothing is going right
Close your eyes and think of me
And soon I will be there
To brighten up even your darkest night

You just call out my name
And you know wherever I am
I'll come running to see you again
Winter, spring, summer or fall
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there
You've got a friend

If the sky above you
Grows dark and full of clouds
And that old north wind begins to blow
Keep your head together
And call my name out loud
Soon you'll hear me knocking at your door

You just call out my name
And you know wherever I am
I'll come running to see you
Winter, spring, summer or fall
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there

Ain't it good to know that you've got a friend
When people can be so cold
They'll hurt you, and desert you
And take your soul if you let them
Oh, but don't you let them

You just call out my name
And you know wherever I am
I'll come running to see you again
Winter, spring, summer or fall
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there
You've got a friend

For Tray, Wage and Babo.

One word to describe today - MAD. Its simply a mad day out with EH today. Everyone I met seems to be so surreal. Everything that is happening is simply out of the blue.I dun know what I to conclude for the day. But I am , for the second weekend, high on booze. I think its the company cause I am enjoying it.

I had an accident last friday involving a bike. It was traumatic. The first since I bought zippy. The first in the last six years.
For the past few days after which, I have been very nervous whilst driving. I didnt event dare to change lane when i see a bike or car coming on too fast. I am literally on the first or second lane on the highway. Naturally, I tried to curb my fears and its better now. If thats not the case, i should really just change to a van - driving at such snail speed. The bike and its driver are okay. Thank goodness he was not having pillion when the accident occurs. If so , the fatality will be ten folds.

The accident happened as I was turning right to the side route leading back to my house. He was coming from a straight rout. I turn a little when I saw his bike approaching. My car halted. The bike came crashing though there wasnt any vehicles on the next lane or mine. It was reported, from his side that he was riding at 40km/hr. For the past few days , I have been speaking with idac, investigative officers , insurance officers. They have been very informative and helpful. I have even tried stimulating the accident by crusing at 40km/hr on the straight rought to the point of crash. I was puzzled he could have easily stopped the bike , given that circumstances. I wasnt even moving when he hit. Nonetheless, he is in the main route and I am turing into a lane. By the rule of Singapore traffic police, the penalty will weigh greater on mine indefinitely.

There is nothing much I can do but just to wait for the final verdict. I cant wait for this to be all over. Its lingering at the back of my mind since that day.

Naturally, I have been very apprehensive and paranoid over this accident and my moving house. It has been only two weeks since I last shifted and I got involved in this. I couldnt help but went to the temple , check up Lillian Too website on fengshui etc. Hopefullly, this faze on superstition is ephemeral. I have been checking my horoscope everyday consciously!! Its vexing!

On hindsight, I have not commuted on a bus or a train for the last four years. Since zippy is sent to the workshop for one week, I am happily going public. Its less stressful as I can read a book and listen to my ipod as I commute. Its therapeutic actually.

I am trying to put this in the simplest of all grammar, so that all the folks which I value, can understand whatever I am writing.

Indeed, I am still high in spirit due to the booze and cigers. It has been a long while since companionship encompasses bitching with heartfelt chatting.
I was feeling pretty down lately over various issues in my life. It comes to a point that you alone cannot resolve and get things done , other than to keep your spirit high and to trudge forward obstacles in jest.
Whatever it is , I am , afterall, human. I shiver when I fear. I feel despondent when I am down. It is mind over body.
Nonetheless, that five hours with all my good mates , and new pals , was uplifting.
I feel better now.

I was in the gym during lunch time today and this song started playing and I have been looping it ever since. It has a melancholic twang that sparked me thinking about the entire year.

有多少愛可以重來　（范媛媛）

作詞：何厚華
作曲：黃卓穎

常常責怪自己　當初不應該
常常後悔沒有把妳留下來
為甚麼明明相愛
到最後還是要分開
是否我們總是　徘徊在心門之外

誰知道又和妳相遇在人海
命運如此安排　總教人無奈
這些年過得不好不壞
只是好像少了一個人存在
而我漸漸明白　妳仍然是我不變的關懷

有多少愛可以重來？
有多少人願意等待？
當懂得珍惜以後回來
卻不知那份愛 會不會還在

有多少愛可以重來？
有多少人值得等待？
當愛情已經桑田滄海
是否還有勇氣去愛？

I wish I am in Hongkong now, to spend my entire december break there with my big sister , Janet , Dorothy and the rest. I dun know why but Hongkong always seems like home with all my old buddies with me. It's not that I do not have great company here. But you know how old friends are - it seems almost telepathy for them to know how you are feeling. Anyway, I refused to give in to my instant gratification, age is really catching up and I have plans for my future. I cant go on living on holidays after holidays.

Hmm..let me pen down my thoughts after listening to this song.

Be it family, love and even friendships, there is no second take. If you screwed up during the first round , it will never be the same on second trying. if you have given it your best shots , there is really no more you can partake. We are , afterall, an integral fragility of the human emotions. Even if it is relived , how much can be let go and re-foster?

I do not believe in second chances. I only want to try my best whenever I am bestowed. To walk away from life not thinking about the "what if".

Its not about a life without regrets. Its a life living in the present , anticipating the future.